The Art of the Cuppa

Last Sunday I went out to lunch with my adopted Lebanese parents and their extended family. Fifteen of us (a small group for them) enjoyed a great time of fellowship. As we ate our food I was asked a question that I have answered countless times since coming to Australia. The question is whether I like Australia or America better. And I answered that question last Sunday the same way I had all those other times. I would rather live in Australia than America.

I deeply love the United States, and will always be proud to be an American. But there is one big difference between the U.S. And Australia that makes a big difference for me. I got to the restaurant at about 1:15 Sunday afternoon. I left the host's house about 4:00 in the afternoon. The reason why I didn't leave from the restaurant was because we had not yet had a “cuppa”.

The routine for lunch or dinner at someones house goes something like this. You sit around and talk while the dinner is being cooked. Then following dinner you sit around and talk a bit more. Sweets (dessert) is served shortly afterwards with coffee. You usually sit around for an hour or so after the coffee having fellowship before leaving. The churches in Australia actually have “cuppas” after church so that people can stand around and talk while drinking coffee and eating cookies (biscuts). It is very rare that everyone will be gone before 1:00.

Why does lunch at a persons house take three and a half to four hours? Because Australians make relationships and connecting with one another a priority. Almost everything in the Australian worldview revolves around relationships. And therefore taking time out of the day and having a cuppa (cup of coffee or tea) while talking is more than just sitting around and having a chat. It is a cornerstone of Australian culture.

Because cuppas are so important coffee is almost a religious thing in Australia. If you don't drink it people will think that you are strange. I didn't drink coffee when I came here but that soon changed. I can still remember my first cup of coffee in Australia. Actually it was a cappuccino given to me by a pastors wife during a church fellowship at their house. I loved it from first sip, and now remind her that my addiction to coffee is because of her (although I am not totally addicted yet).

I have grown to love cuppas. During the week they don't last for more than three hours. Sometimes they just last for a few minutes. But it gives friends a chance to slow down for a few moments and share what is going on in their lives. It is not really about the coffee at all. It is about reconnecting with people who you know and love.

Not many people have cuppas in the United States. We are all so busy with life that it is almost impossible to just take a few minutes and talk with an old friend. I do understand that we all constantly have things that need to get done. But the Australian people make time to connect. They may even put something off until tomorrow that they can do today in order to have a cuppa. I am not saying that this isn't a dangerous thing to do. For if we continue to procrastinate on important things our lives will suffer the consequences. But being in Australia has taught me that if people make connecting with others a priority, they will find time for it.

There have been many times since I came here when I was discouraged about situations that weren't going the way I wanted them to. But after sitting down with friends and sharing the burdens I experienced the peace of God. Sometimes having a cup of coffee with a friend means I have to drive forty-five minutes both ways to do so, but it is worth it. The experiences I had led me to minister to others in this way.

About two weeks ago I finally broke down and bought a Plunger (french coffee press) so that I could make coffee at home, and real coffee (Gloria Jeans Caramel flavoured). I am praying that God would give me the chance to have some friends over for a good cup of coffee. But if not thats okay, I can enjoy it by myself.